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The video iPod is the sexiest thing I have ever touched that didn’t have skin.

My new iPod (purchased last week during the Apple online store sale as a replacement for my 2nd generation eBayed model whose battery is going down faster than a sorority girl at a frat party) is having one hell of a voyage to reach me. I must confess envy when I read the Fedex tracker information:

Nov. 27: Shanghai, China
Nov. 28: Anchorage, Alaska
Nov. 28: Memphis, Tennessee
Nov. 29: Mississauga, Ontario (slightly less envious of this destination)

What’s particularily lovely about this is that I didn’t pay extra for 3-day shipping, but took the free, 12-14 day shipping option… and it’s still only going to take three days.

TOMORROW, MY PRECIOUS!

“I’m not going to descend to their level, I’m going to carpet bomb them from up here.”

WHY is it news that Oprah isn’t invited to Tom Cruise’s wedding? WHY?! Why am I hearing about this every half hour?

This ranks above even Paris Hilton’s lost dog on the THIS-ISN’T-FUCKING-NEWS-YOU-IDIOTS-o-Meter.

If one suddenly feels unwell, throws up into a napkin at one’s desk, tosses it into the garbage and then keeps on working, does that make one a workaholic or merely practical?

it’s such a long walk to the bathroom.