WAI MUST PEEPEL NEED TO UZE WRDS?!?!?!!!!
So I play WoW. That’s basically what my life consists of: Work and WoW, in grossly unequal measures (guess which one gets more of my time. Guess! I dare you.)
I’m in a guild in the game, as one does. We’ve been around for a while, we’re well-known, we’re doing pretty well in content… all this means that we get a lot of applications to join our guild.
I don’t know how many of you play MMORPGs, but those of us who do know that the written word is not always considered to be a necessary, nor even viable medium of communication. Words are for n00bs. Stupid n00bs and their words and their talking to each other. Kill things! Get stuff! Grunt! That’s what REAL men do, damnit.
So the other day we got an application. It was vaguely illiterate, but most of them are. Then we asked him to answer a few questions about some tricky bits of his application. A conversation ensued that I can’t, actually, in all conscience call a conversation, because that would imply that both sides were communicating coherently. In this case, his half of the conversation consisted of stuff like the following:
ya u just dont get it get a guild like urs then it would be end of story but since joe i can tell from the start does not like me maybe bad past experience or then the seccond part join basicly whatever guild guild i can fill in my epics then re apply to high end guilds. yes i suck at typing and soem sentences might not make sence idk im a wiz at math and numbers and i can run a very succesful business english and typing is not needed only to know how to run a business and work very well with adults. im not a english teacher for people on the net i have better things to do that correct english lol
I was going to make a comment, to wit, that perfect written english may not be necessary to run a business, but successful communication skills ARE. I didn’t bother, for obvious reasons, but I have to say, if this guy runs a business, I would pay cashmonies to have a hidden camera to watch when he delivers to clients:
dood: heerz ur app, just liek u sed to mak teh bomsprng go too teh hapfelstncer thang.
Client: What?
dood: Nevr mind tokin, jest luk at teh app!
Client: This is a login page for an invisibility webservice. Where is the banana sorter I asked for?
dood: Hai told u ther was a thin n teh box fr lettin u go to teh pinapple candi land! I sed it alredy!
Client: What?
dood: Y can’t u understnd my sooperyer skillz?!
Client: What? Give me back my money, idiot.
dood: WAI MUST PEEPEL NEED TO UZE WRDS?!?!?!!!!